Bish, don't kill my vibe

by mariela torres April 24, 2017

One of the most valuable things my mom deeply embedded in me was to never be a hater. She'd often say "Don't be jealous of other people, it's the ugliest emotion" Although the empowerment of females is on a rise we still get women trying to constantly put us down. If you're a women reading this, I KNOW you've experienced a time a female has been rude to you simply because she was jealous. I have my share of stories but this incident primarily sticks out.  

I met and became really good friends with these two guys instantly. One of the dudes was throwing a brunch/all day drinking shindig for his bday. I walk in solo to a table sitting around 15 people brunching it up in the trendy lounge. I introduce myself to everyone and sit down on a small ottoman across my new friends. This girl there, we'll call her "mean girl" was sitting in-between my two new pals. She got up and was gone for awhile mingling with others there. My buddy yells out "Yo Chic, (his nickname for me) come sit with us" I got off the uncomfortable yet stylish looking stool and made my way towards the big comfy couch. A few minutes later she walks back looks directly at me and says "Are you fucking serious?" I immediately say "I'm sorry, I'll move over..." She rolls her eyes and ignores my offer. I brush it off.  

Though out the day whenever I would talk to either one of my friends she would pull them away or stand in-between us to stop the conversation. She'd whisper with her girl friends while staring at me. She would deliberately try to exclude me, saying things like "Next week me, name, name, name should go to dinner." (pointing at everyone but me) I brushed it off. Before we hopped on over to the next bar. A person not partaking in the next round of shenanigans got up to say bye to the birthday boy. "Mean girl" gets up too, she's looking directly at me but talking to my friend and says "I want to sit next to you but someone needs to move" I looked around the room like "Woah! Did anyone just hear that?!" I again brush it off.   

I would purposely hang out as far away from her as possible but everywhere I would go she would appear trying to make me feel uneasy and unwanted. I left the bar to buy some gum at a 711 right across the street. I come back and offer my new group of friends some, a few minutes later I look around to see her holding it... I walk up and ask for it back. "I'm holding it for (friends name)" I reply "yeah, it's mine though, I literally just bought it" she replies "but im holding it." This pointless conversation goes back and forth until she finally aggressively hands me the now half empty pack of gum. I was over it. I decided to go. "Why are you leaving so soon?" My friend asks. I begin to tell him about "mean girl" then boom he finally witnesses it himself. Him and I are in mid conversation and she YELLS his name out from across the room, we both turn towards her "I was talking to (friends name), not you" staring at me with this evil smirk on her face. I looked at him, laughed and said "told you" and walked out of the bar.  

My buddy who is now one of my best friends confronted her about her bitch fit. "I didn't like how she walked in. She walked in like she owned the place" she reveals. My response "Hell yeah I walked in like I own the place! Thank you for the compliment!" 

Ladies, calling a girl fat doesn't make you less skinny. Calling a girl ugly doesn't make you prettier. You MUST know that confident women do NOT hate. If a girl is being rude to you know that it's her own insecurities that she's struggling with, it has nothing to do with you. When put in a position like this, forgive and walk away. Do not view this as being weak, it's actually being strong as hell by not giving someone else the power to fuck with your vibe. We don't have control over how people treat us but we do have control over our reactions. Choose love always. Do not succumb to people's rude behavior. Competing and hating on one another only sets us back. We're one the same team, ladies, and now more then ever is the time that we need to empower one another! 

"A rising tide lifts all boats" 

mariela torres
mariela torres


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